Today's post

I went into hospital this morning for two hours or so to get my fix of cortisone. Irritately enough, I had to actually go through the whole admissions process, get issued a bed, the whole toot, instead of just going via casualties. This is so that the Medical Aid will pay for the procedure. Goodness knows why, because it works out more expensive for them, but anyway. I have no intention of paying for it out of my own pocket, as it adds up to about R2000. Not petty cash.

Right now, I am feeling deceptively good. Actually, I feel like a million dollars. I’m glad I went, because it was time. The purple spots in front of my eyes were going haywire, which is a precursor for serious loss of vision in a couple of weeks time, if left untreated. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. But I still feel a bit indecisive, driving everyone around me nuts, because I don’t like taking the medication if I can help it, that’s no secret. I never no when I should take it, because I have to distinguish between residual symptoms, which have been there for years, and new or worsening symptoms, which is not always easy. I’m resigned to taking the meds now, in fact, I think of it as my friend. But I still don’t want to overdo it, as there are dire long-term side-effects, which I don’t even feel like discussing.
I know that the side-effects (short-term, that is) will hit me tomorrow. Then I’ll say, “I feel like I’ve been hit by a bus.” Which is silly because I think someone who has been hit by a bus will disagree.
But I won’t feel good. I’ll feel depressed, very tired, flu-like, achey-breakey. But knowing that it’ll pass in a couple of days does make it easier, especially the medication-induced depression.

I met a woman in the bed next to me who also has ms. I was keeping a low-profile while my drip was running, but when I found out she is also an ms-er, I felt like a child with a new playmate. She is much worse than I am, though. She is currently in hospital for two weeks, taking 1g of cortisone every second day. Yikes! And that’s not all she’s taking. She’s on a whole ritz of other medication. She told me she got such an (opportunistic) infection in her eye that she nearly lost it!
I know this is totally awful, and I’m ashamed to admit it, but it does cheer me up a bit when I meet someone who’s worse off than I am. Don’t get me wrong, I feel really sorry for her, but it does have the effect of making me grateful for my own situation.
Not like when I hear of people with ms doing triathlons for charity, lol. That makes me feel very inadequate.

I saw a black guy in town yesterday. He was on crutches. I didn’t want to stare, but I think he may have had a leg missing. He had a serious deformity on his face. His forehead bulged out, out of all proportion, like a massive swelling. I only saw him fleetingly, but I have been thinking of him ever since. What must his life have been like? He looks oldish and very poor. It is really wrenching at my heart. He wasn’t begging for money, just crossing the street, so I didn’t want to accost him with money. He’s been on my mind such a lot, though, I wish now that I had reached out in some way. How blessed my own life is, really.

I’m going to try and drink as much water as I can for the rest of the day, as that really seems to take the edge off the effects of the meds.

Ouch, my back is sore. Forgot about that little side-effects!
Oh yes, and one other thing. I am so grateful that I have lovely, visible veins. They never battle to get a needle in there, unlike the poor girl in the next bed, who ends up having to get it in her neck because her other veins are so flat. My sisters actually don’t have such great-shakes veins, looks like I am the lucky one!

One other last thing ;-) Darling hubby is out playing a much-deserved game of golf. Apart from putting up with my 'will-I-won't-I' charade, he very kindly and supportively took me to the hospital this morning and waited there with me the whole time. Bless his heart.